Motherhood, insanity and everyday life.

Monday, July 09, 2007

Like Getting Blood from a Turnip

It’s no secret that raising teenagers is hard. And it’s not so much that you raise them, but rather that you survive their upbringing. And let me say that in the teen lottery, I’ve done extremely well. I have two amazing kids who rarely look for or get into trouble. For that, I’m eternally grateful. Yet even when you parent great kids, there are some tough times.

Currently, my greatest challenge is information. Regularly, my kids and I play a cat and mouse game of me attempting to get information and them doing their best not to divulge it. My feeling is that I need to know as much as possible. My kids’ opinion is that I’ll get that information on a need-to-know basis and they feel that I need to know as little as possible.

I believe that I’m not prying and any parenting expert will tell you that the best way to insure that your kids are OK is if you find out what they’re doing and with whom they’re doing it. Get to know their friends. Make a point of meeting their friends’ parents. Find out what they’re doing and where they went. Get details.

Ah, what’s that they say? The devil is in the details? Yeah, that right there is my problem. My kids are pretty good at giving me a bit of info about their plans, their friends and their relationships, but the emphasis is definitely on “a bit.”

And so I do what any other mom would do – I dig a bit. I’ve become an expert at asking questions – lots of them. I get creative with my interrogation. I pepper them with innocent little inquiries, usually while they’re doing something else such as eating or watching TV. I lull them into complacency and perhaps sharing a bit more than they intended. Sometimes it works, sometimes, not so much. Yet still, I press on and I’ll continue to do so, likely long past the days when they continue to live with us. Because the only thing more difficult than getting information from your kids is letting go of them.


At 10:17 PM , Blogger kenju said...

You're right! And what's even harder is finding out 25-30 years down the road that they did things you had no clue about at the time. My children have finally begun to share with me some of the wild things they did when young, such as riding bikes along and over a 6-lane interstate (after throwing the bikes over a chain link fence) to go to K-mart or a lake when they were 8-10-12 yrs. old. Had I known then what they were doing, I'd have died from fright. It's bad enough to know now....LOL

At 9:55 AM , Blogger Em said...

We've got three teens...and never knew less about them than we do right now! They just have that teenage mumble...uh huh...uh huh....

At 11:11 PM , Blogger Jess Riley said...

You're a good mom, Karen. I remember being so annoyed when my parents wanted to know who I was with, and what their last names were, etc. Now I look back and think, "Thank God!!"

At 3:22 AM , Blogger Anna said...

Amen Sister!

Outside of becoming THE NEW HUMAN ATM and am also a licensed card carrying member of TSI. Teen Secrecy Investigators.


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