Leap of Faith

My kid is going to college. No, it's not really a surprise. We've pretty much been planning on this for the past 17+ years. We saved for it. We threatened that it would be a military institution. (It's not.) We prayed he'd get there someday. And now it's official. He's been accepted to a school that he wants and that wants him back and so we've signed him up and sent off the check.

Gradually, it's hitting me between the eyes: he's leaving. This is sort of the beginning of the end. I remember watching an episode of Oprah where she had these freaky women that were clinically depressed when their children went to college. (One was this way when her kids went to kindergarten - Hello, Dr. Phil?...) Anyway, I laughed at them and said I'd never be that way. Now, I'm not so sure.

Here's the thing: He's going to be 6 hours away. He's sort of nervous about it and so am I. My freshman year of college, I had some lame-brained idea that I should go to school in Florida - 26 hours from home. It was a disaster from start to finish. Now, I'm worrying that my son is in for the same kind of freshman year that I had - SCARY! On the one hand, it was a good experience for me to cut the apron strings, but on the other hand, I can't stand the thought of him being unhappy.

Jeez! You'd think he was five years old! I know he'll be fine and he gets to major in music, which he adores. I just have visions of the entire football team taunting him, making his life a living hell.

On the other hand, he's probably glad to be away from me and my endless string of nags and questions. But it sure doesn't feel like he's ready. I pray that he is. This truly is a leap of faith.