Please Pass the Geritol

When I was a kid, the true sign of getting old was if you needed Geritol. We had no idea what it did, but the commercials on TV showed old people taking it and suddenly feeling great.

I am happy to say that I have not yet taken Geritol, although based on their website, maybe I should.

Nowadays, there’s a new sign that you’re, well, maybe not old¸ but well on your way: You and your friends are getting a colonoscopy. Although I have a little bit of time before getting my own, today, I’m taking my husband for his colonoscopy. If this means he’s old, then I’m right behind him.

Hopefully, this will be a boring day (for me) and an equally boring and a not too awful and uneventful experience for him.

And if you haven’t considered getting a colonoscopy, allow me to share the wit and wisdom of the always hilarious Dave Barry on this, um, awkward subject. Yeah, sounds like fun, doesn’t it?

Willard's Knocking

Most days, I don’t really think about what the President is doing. Occasionally, I’ll see him on TV and think deep thoughts like: “Ooh, that was awkward.” Or, “I wonder if somebody wakes him up in the morning or if he has an alarm clock.”

Today, we have a brand new president. I hope he can fix anything and everything, but I know he can’t. Nevertheless, here’s the daunting thought that entered my mind:

I am older than the President of the United States. Seriously. We’re talking nine months and 19 days. Whoa.

Who cares about the country - when did I get that old? Honestly, I’m only two steps behind the Smucker’s seniors that Willard Scott rambles on about every morning.

It never fails to amaze me how I can take an international event and make it about me.

I Can't Help It!

This has turned me into a totally obsessive stage mom. Can you blame me? Check out my daughter in front of more than 10,000 people: